Detective Iwa
by RyugaFangirlX
Summary: Deidara Iwa, a famous cop bound to succeed in anything he does ,took a dangerous mission where his life can easily end: Catch the World's most wanted criminal ,Akasuna no Sasori. What happens when he actually can't bring himself to kill the redhead? For 2nd SasoDei month


**Umm Hey *waves awkwardly* Gah,I know I have another story to finish but I really wanted to write this one ,it was stuck in my head :/ Gomen.  
**

**Also sorry for any mistakes. I'm only 14 *pouts***

**Random shout out (because I'm that insane): SASO X DEI FOR ALL ETERNITY! WOOO! THE HOT ARTISTIC TEAM FTW!**

**Warning: Swearing, Yaoi, Yaoi, Yaoi, Yaoi and Yaoi.  
**

**Deidara is both a cop and a detective. Does that even make sense? (idn lol)**

**Disclaimer: A little shit like me does not own Sasori no Danna , Dei-senpai or any other Naruto characters.**

**Hope you like ^^**

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''Well, well, if it isn't Deidara'', Pein waved at the grinning like no tomorrow blonde who was entering the huge building at the very moment. Happy go lucky as always. Then again, that's how Deidara was. Even when sad and depressed , he still managed to wear that stupid , pathetic smile on his face. Itachi thought it was annoying as hell, it was going on his nerves.

''Hello, Leader-Pein, un'', he smiled in return ,trying to get off all the damn fangirls stuck to him like a leech. They had not changed at all. No matter how many times he told them 'no' whenever they asked him to marry them , the rabid amount of them still kept on chasing him. It was rather funny actually , but not for Deidara. Konan had already said that he was gay ,however 'the crazy bunch of crap' as Deidara liked to call them that often, didn't listen and just complained that when someday he would find his 'soulmate' it would be hawt. Of course by 'hawt' they meant hot. _You've got to be fucking kidding me._

''Long time no see Detective Deidara. We have a request for you , but I'm going to warn you this one won't be like good old times at all. _This _is dangerous'', Pein stated with a somewhat serious face and when he said 'dangerous' which by the way was rare, something was up. Deidara nodded, seeing as he pretty much liked danger, heck he loved it and started walking forward to Pein's office. As expected all the famous and bound to succeed in everything they do, cops were there. Hidan was arguing with Kakuzu like always, Tobi was jumping up and down pissing Zetsu off , Konan was trying to bring peace to this huge mess and Kisame was talking with...Deidara growled , Uchiha Itachi.

''Senpai! Senpai! Tobi missed you!'', Tobi started hugging him tightly and poor Deidara couldn't breathe. He swore to God how the heck did this dumbass even made it as a cop? He was nothing but an annoying little shit who was bringing nothing but problems to the organization. Pain must of been drunk when he accepted him. Oh wait , he wasn't.

''Tobi! Get the fuck off of me asshole!'', Deidara shouted at him and the masked-boy immediately backed off ,as if taking the hint his Senpai was giving. Just when Deidara opened his mouth to say something, Tobi started crying and this crying got louder where almost to the point even Hidan thought the black haired idiot had gone mad.

''Well fucking done blondie! Now get him to shut up!'',the albino didn't like noise or anything of the sort for that matter. He was about to curse and mumble something about Jashin when Deidara glared daggers at him.

''I ugh didn't mean to shout at you ,yeah. I'm sorry Tobi '', he offered a smile at the raven and all the Akatsuki anime fell on the floor. Hidan's eyes widen in complete shock and wonder , he was only joking for Jashin's sake . Since when did Deidara become so nice to Tobi? Fuck that, since when did he even become polite at all? Figures.

''Tobi forgives Senpai! Will Senpai play with Tobi? Pretty please? '',he made the super kawaii (cute) eyes but Deidara wasn't the type to fall for that. He scratched his head, trying to think of an excuse while Tobi kept that adorable face despite the many glares he was receiving. After what seemed like years, Konan saved the day by dragging Tobi out of the office and telling him that they had a job to get done.

''I assume you know the great Akasuna no Sasori and all his victims '',Pein glanced at Deidara who nodded nervously. Not a single noise was heard in the room and all eyes immediately fell on Deidara. _Oh shit,don't tell me they actually expect me to arrest that damn bastard Akasuna,un! Great,just great._ The cop face palmed and Itachi smirked.

Akasuna no Sasori was in fact the world's most wanted criminal and bloody murderer. Only his name was revealed all these years , not his face not anything else. They didn't know how he looked like nor his expectations. His true identity towards the humanity had to be found yet. All their attempts of hard work and vigils to put him in prison, brought nothing but an enormous failure and shame towards the professional policemen in the entire planet who had to quit from shamelessness. It would be a miracle if Deidara actually made it out alive. In other words, either dead or alive he would still have to say goodbye to his precious job. The blonde gritted his teeth in anger. So that explains why that damn Uchiha was smirking the entire time from the very beginning Deidara stepped his foot in this place.

But ha! Like he would give up that easily. He had already figured it out that Itachi had obviously suggested that Deidara would have to do this job. And of course Pein agreed because that weasel was like his right hand, why wouldn't he? He would show the entire organization , the whole world that he could do it. That would sure as heck prove that he wasn't some useless man who only loved to joke around. 'Cause that's what he was doing during his time here. He was the best around here, yeah! These fools didn't even stand a small chance against him. Okay maybe they did but he was still determined and ruthless to take this perilous mission of life and death. He would show them all.

''Yes, in fact I do, un. I even bet this Akasuna is nothing but a piece of cake, yeah'', he closed his eyes and lifted his head up proudly in an immature way. There was an awkward silence for minutes when suddenly they all burst out laughing, some even holding their sides for support. Deidara frowned and raised a blonde eyebrow, what was so funny?

''F-Fucking b-barbie y-you actually think you can take on Sasori? Now that's one hell of a joke!'',the Jashinist managed to say between laughter. Good think Kakuzu shushed him before he could run out of oxygen. Deidara's eye twitched dangerously at the 'barbie' part. There goes the second nickname. Hidan either called him 'blondie' or 'barbie' . Personally, Deidara hated both.

''Shut up Hidan, yeah! What makes you think I possibly can't take this guy on my own,un? And stop fucking calling me barbie! It pisses me off,un!'', Deidara slammed both of his hands on the table and Konan gasped . Pein glared at nothing in particular, he was surrounded by stupid idiots who just couldn't shut up. What did they think? This was damn serious.

''SILENCE!''

Before you could say 'whoops' they immediately shut their mouths. Deidara and Hidan gulped.

''God,you're all such a pain in the ass! Dare to interrupt me again and I swear!'', Pein sighed melancholically and took a deep breath before continuing. ''Now where were we? Oh,Deidara I also forgot to mention that you will be taking this mission _all alone_. There will not be any backups like usual so prepare yourself. I do not take any responsibility of what may happen nor for the consequenses. Farewell'',he exited the room with the rest , leaving a stunning blonde beside the window.

_Holy shit,un. This is all fucked up..._

~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~

Deidara was walking down the street ,not even knowing where the hell he was going. Or where he was actually _supposed _to be going. Everything was just messed up; he didn't have a map ( stupid blonde, cops always carried a god damn map with them) and Pein didn't give him the directions to the so called criminal who was sure as hell going to burn him alive. Hold it , he hit his forehead. Of course Pein wouldn't give him any directions , nobody barley knew where in hell Sasori was at the time! _Seriously fuck this shit._ So what was left to do?

''Hey you!'' , suddenly a voice interrupted him from his thoughts. It was a blonde girl , with brown eyes and dressed luxiriant. She was what you may call a 'high class'.

''Me,un?'',the blonde questioned in wonder.

''Yeah you, aren't you a cop?'',Deidara nodded his head yes and the girl told him to follow her. She led Deidara into the middle of the street where several dead bodies lay before him.

''Take a look at this'',the chick pointed somewhere in the distance. All of a sudden, Deidara felt sick. Pein had been right. _All_ of them had been fucking right. This wasn't like his previous employments at all. This was far _worse._

There was a girl at about the age of 17 whom the blood was coming from her stomach and near her neck. Her skin color was brightly pale.

''Glad you detective could make it'',a brown haired man walked up to Deidara. The girl explained it was her husband and the blonde cop told them that they were a cute couple at which they both thanked him for.

''So what happened here,yeah?'', Deidara asked suspiciously. They looked down sadly and then her husband ,Johny was his name if Deidara heard it right, started talking.

''We got a call just a few minutes ago'',Johny explained .''A resident here said that he heard some screaming and yelling''

''When did all of that happen, un?'', Deidara asked as he wrote the story on his notebook.

''Just about 10 minutes ago'',he answered with a frown.

Deidara's eyes widen in shock ''Woah'', he glanced at his watch then back at the engaged couple.''Are you serious,un?''

''Yep'',Johny nodded.''Plus a couple of other people said that they saw someone running away after he stabbed this girl to death'',he pointed at the dead body.

''Holy crap...'', Deidara took a look again imagining his own self in this girl's position. His quickly shook his head nervously and tried to think of something else. Sasori was probably going to do the same to him as well. He shivered at the thought and brushed it off.

''But we found this'',Johny continued,holding up a chef's knife in a plastic bag. ''We counted , of course we aren't professionals such as yourself but it looks like the guy stabbed her 10 times in a row. She was stabbed in the stomach ,the heart , both her lungs, and between her legs'',he explained once more.

''Ugh un...'',Deidara raised a brow in disgust. He looked down at the girl again. Poor thing. She looked like a high school student , and yet she's been killed. The blonde shook his head sadly. A few minutes later the news reporter explained the world about the scene of the crime , an ambulance came by and took the pinkette to the hospital. After that, the streets were cleared and everyone left , including our blonde detective. Rain was starting to pour down a little faster than before. Lucky for Deidara, he knew how to drive in a rainstorm. The thunder roared a couple times fast as the lighting flashed the sky. As for Deidara, he couldn't get the young girl out of his mind.

_Her death must've been serious,yeah. I'm not a fool,I know you are the cause Akasuna...Just you wait,un._

_XXxx_ The next day _xxXX_

The following day, Deidara was driving through the town in his own car. He was enjoying the sound of some pop/rock music . He began to sing the lyrics: (A/N for those who want to know the song I got the lyrics from is Pyromania but the male version. It suits Dei perfectly. Amazing song and I highly recommend it! ^^)

**_Call me obsessed_**  
**_ Call me insane_**  
**_ Something is creeping through my veins_**  
**_ My eyes cannot see_**  
**_ What's underneath_**  
**_ I can't stop and you can't stop me_**

**_I'm gonna get this fire started_**  
**_ Impossible for you to breath_**  
**_ The temperatures rising up (up, so hot)_**  
**_ Cause I'm burning up_**

**_Pyromania_**  
**_ Pyromania ow_**  
**_ Pyromania_**

**_Ah ah ow-_**

Before Deidara continued to sing the song ,his radio suddenly started getting fuzzy. He pressed a few buttons to listen to some other radio stations, but they were fuzzy too._ What the fuck?_ He began to get angry. All he wanted to do was to listen to some damn music. There was only one thing to do...

''Aww man!'',Deidara complained. ''I don't wanna go to the car shop, yeah! Too lazy,ugh'''

Suddenly he began to hear some loud beeping. He looked over at the oil gauge and it said that it was half empty. So he fucking _had _to go to the car shop. He sighed as he started looking for a car shop nearby._ This is all your fuckin' fault, Akasuna! Hope you just burn in hell,un._

A few minutes later, Deidara pulled up at the front of 'Christy's Car Shop'. The place was huge...Not only it had a garage to fix cars ,but it also had a car wash to it also. Deidara parked the car, took his car keys and the rushed inside the shop. At the front desk was a 5'5 tall man with bob cut blonde hair and had an idiotic smile on his face.

''Can I help you?'', he asked nicely. So nicely that Deidara almost puked.

''Yeah,I need some help with my ...car,un'', Deidara sighed.

''What's wrong with it?'',the teen wondered.

''Well, my radio's jacked up and somehow ,I need to refill oil tank,un''

''No problem. Please wait'',the man pointed to a small couch at a nearby wall.

''Ok,thank you, yeah'',Deidara said as he walked to the couch. He sat on the couch softly. It was quite comfortable , considering that it looked brand new. Just then, the man walked up to him with a pen and paper. A huge smile came upon his face. Deidara looked at him oddly.

''Yeah?''

''Can I have your autograph?'', the man asked anxiously. ''I'm like a huge fan of yours. I like how you always send bad guys to jail. You're my hero, believe it!''(A/N now you know who that man is XDD)

''Uh-huh with pleasure,un'', Deidara smiled kindly, taking the paper and pen.

Two hours later , the blonde was asleep on the couch. The employees were taking so long to fix up his car. At first he watched some television, but all it showed was some boring soap opera shows. After 15 minutes, he dozed off to Sleepy World. As he was snoring loudly like a bear, the man poked him on the stomach to wake him up. He finally stopped snoring and opened his baby blue eyes.

''What, un?'', Deidara yawned as he sat up and rubbed his eyes. Damn, he was dreaming about a world without criminals and only happiness. Like that would ever happen anyway.

''We're finished with your car'', the man smiled. ''Sorry it took so long . We had a lot of customers today. Plus, we have a new guy here that did most of the work. So we had to go back and forth on your car and everyone else's''

''Wow'', Deidara said sarcastically.

''Anyway, I'll show you to your car'', the other blonde helped him up from the couch.

They walked to a large green door . Both of them walked inside the garage. Deidara's car was located in the middle of a red van and a yellow beetle car. Apparently, there were about 13 cars in total that were fixed perfectly.

''Welp, there's your car'', the man greeted.

''So how much do I have to pay, hmm?'', Deidara asked as he reached for his wallet.

''Oh, no, no, it's all good'',the man stopped him politely. ''Since you're pretty famous , you don't have to pay much for the car''

''Really, yeah?'', Deidara blinked in total confusion.

''Well, all we had to do was place a new battery for your radio; fill up the oil tank , put some air in your tires, and that's pretty much it''

''Huh'',Deidara blinked again. ''Still'', he filled out a check and handed it to the man.

''Are you sure?'',he asked nicely, a small blush on his cheeks.

''You deserve it, un'', Deidara stated grinning. ''Same with the new guy, whoever it is, yeah''

''Ugh okay'', he went back inside and waved goodbye which Deidara happily returned.

Deidara got in his car and started it up. Good news was his radio ,oil tank and tires we fixed. _Fuck yes._ So he was good to go. He left the place, smirking all the way.

~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un

He began to have doubts on finding him. He had been driving all damn night in these god damn streets but nothing. Not a single move from the great Akasuna no Sasori. Deidara wondered what really was going on in his mind. Like how exactly was Sasori thinking on killing him. Everyone already knew that the famous Detective Iwa was in action and ready to catch that bastard and put him where he belongs. So that means that Sasori was aware of who was trying to imprison him this time. And that my dear friends made things even more awesome, note the sarcasm. Oh, Deidara was going to die this night for sure.

He bet Itachi and Sasuke were now at their office, laughing their asses out like the blonde had already died. Deidara would not give them such pleasure. He would not die, he would survive somehow. But how? Despite the fact that he was an S-ranked detective and cop , he still couldn't help but fear for the worst which was yet to come. Did all these years really go to waste? Had he been drunk when he decided he would become a cop? A successful one at that? Well ,no. He definitely wasn't drunk that time ,though he still had some vodka. It kinda relaxed him for some reason. He brought one bottle with him too but it didn't change a thing. He would be nervous besides the many cups of drinks he had drunk.

That was one of Sasori's great talents, he once heard. He had that stupid ability and skill to mess with people's minds. He could make them nervous while they actually weren't , he could make them beg for mercy while they actually didn't want to. Beg and Want are two different things, they don't have a thing in common. Beg and crave mean to ask in a serious and sometimes humble manner , especially for something one cannot claim as a right. In the other hand, Want is the state of not having; the condition of being without anything ; to feel need of; to wish or long for; to desire and to crave.

Unfortunately , Sasori did not understand that difference or he just liked to play along. Deidara guessed the second.

Then in a flesh, all went black.

''What the? Where am I, un?'',Deidara looked around the room , raising his eyebrows as he did so. He glanced at his body and almost screamed. He was tied up, in a fucking chair. Then it hit him...Oh no,no no no no no! _Please don't let it be him for God's sake, un!_

''Kukukuku~ If it isn't the great as fuck detective, Iwa Deidara. Hmph'',a voice, _a sexy_ voice called up. Who the hell? What was happening? He couldn't even see who it was ,but he assumed it was a 'he' by the voice.

''Who the fuck are you,un! Show yourself, yeah!'', Deidara demanded , hitting his foot on the ground. Was this person joking around? Actually scratch that, why in hell did he kidnap him?

''Such a loud mouth girly, calm down will ya?'',the same voice spoke up but this time ,even more _hotter._ Deidara couldn't see him because he was hidden in the shadows. Could it be?

''Well for your information ,I'm a boy, yeah! Do you want proof too or something?'', Deidara couldn't believe he actually said that. The situation he was in ,was rather pissing him off.

''You sure do look pathetic for a guy, Brat~'', Deidara heard footsteps and a shiver run down his spine. Okay now he was convinced but how does he escape from this shit? Damn, he should've closed the car windows.

''Who are you calling brat ,you loser! Come and face me like a man,un! Or are you scared?'',the blonde smirked at the last sentence and a growl was heard. Heh, that probably pissed him off. Or just maybe Deidara was going to get killed right away. Probably.

''Do you know who are you speaking to right now, brat?'',the figure was coming closer and closer and Deidara was dying to see what an asshole his kidnapper was. Deidara scoffed.

''Well no but-'', before he could finish what he was saying a young man with red hair and chocolate eyes appeared before him. Deidara thought he was going to faint. He was sooooo hawt and adorable. Deidara would've hugged him to death by now if it weren't for the ropes tied around his body.

''I'm Akasuna no Sasori and you must know in what situation you're currently in'', the redhead smirked sexily and Deidara gasped as his eyes became slightly smaller. T-This couldn't be Sasori. This was not Sasori! Deidara brought his hands on his head ,panicking. _No way, no fucking way,un! I refuse ,I refuse to believe this nonsense! _

He quickly grabbed the gun which came out of nowhere and pointed at the criminal who only smirked again in joy. Such a pathetic brat.

''Oh? Scared now,are we?''

''Sh-shut the fuck up! I'm fucking gonna kill you here and now, un!'', Deidara's hands started shaking with the gun and Sasori found it hilarious.

''Go ahead, do it brat. I deserve it anyway'',yet again another smirk was echoed through the room. Deidara couldn't bring himself to do it._ Focus! What are you doing idiot?! Just shoot this fucker's face off!_

Deidara couldn't. He just couldn't. The gun fell into the floor and Sasori was completely shocked. Wasn't this stupid cop going to kill him?

The blonde kissed the redhead after what seemed like years. They didn't know how or what exactly they were doing but they loved it. They started a new kiss that was even more passionate than the last one and Deidara moaned._ God,why the fuck does he have to be so sexy,un?_ They completely lost their mind in pleasure and ecstasy. This was just WAY too hot to handle.

''Brat, what the hell are you doing? This isn't right. I will kill you,I'm supposed to kill you'' , Sasori glared at him.

''Do I look like a give a fuck, yeah?'' , Deidara threw Sasori onto the bed and attacked him with another kiss. Their tongues fought for dominance and neither of them was giving in. Sasori trailed his hands down and started unbottoning the black pants. He could clearly see the hard bulge behind it. He let his fingers slide over the tight fabric, for which he earned a pleasant moan from the cop.

Sasori's erection grew painfully hard and he couldn't wait anymore. He rubbed his crotch against Deidara's.

''Impatient I see, hmmm'', Deidara snickered. He slowly left a trail of kissed ,nibbles and sucking over Sasori's body ,covering it in hickeys. When he reached the nipples, he took one into his mouth and flicked his tongue against it. After a while, Deidara put Sasori's member into his mouth and licked the head. He could taste the bit of precum on his tongue. He let Sasori's cock slip out of his mouth and gave it a painfully slow lick from shaft to top.

''B-Brat''

''~Sasori-Danna~''

''Beg for it babe.''

''Jerk,un. Fine. I beg you , please I need you inside of me, yeah'', Deidara pleaded.

''What was that Iwa? I couldn't hear you'',how Sasori loved to tease like this.

''Fuck me,un! I want you to fuck me!''

''~Music to my ears~'', the Akasuna chuckled.

''You better make it fucking worth it'', Deidara grumbled before he slipped his tongue into Sasori's mouth. The blonde moaned lustful while he caressed Sasori's chest. He placed tiny kisses on the cold skin of his neck, leaving a hot trail on it.

''Your lips make me go crazy'', Sasori panted ,leaning his head to the side , so those lips got better access. ''Damn,I can't hold it much any longer''

''Me neither,un'', after a few pumps of Sasori's hand ,they both reached their climax and came. The hot liquid spurted out all over their stomachs. Both immediately fell to the bed exhausted.

''That was amazing, yeah'', Deidara smirked after a few minutes but then reality gave him a hard slap in the face. He just had sex with a criminal and what criminal, the God damn Akasuna no Sasori. What was happening? Why didn't he kill him when he had the chance? Why,why? What would he tell to the Akatsuki now?

''Leave before I change my mind,brat. You seriously messed up with my mind and for some fucking strange reason, I can't kill you! What have you done to me? You should've already been dead! Dead,I tell you! But no, you're fucking alive and breathing! You know what? Fuck this shit,if this was your plan to put me in jail all along just do it! I don't fucking care anymore!''

''Saso,there's no way I'm going to let them have you,un. I won't let them take you away from me. I'd rather die, yeah''

''What? Listen here, Deidara you're a cop and I'm the criminal. It's either I kill you or you put me in prison. It's your decision brat''

''Then kill me''

''Stop messing with my fucking mind. You know I can't''

''I love you 'Sori'',Deidara hugged him tight ,not letting him go. He then smirked''Say it,un''

''But it's pathetic''

''Say it,un!''

''Stupid brat ,I love you, there happy?''

''Un''

~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un~un`u

**''HE WHAT**?'',Pein slipped his coffee as he heard the news. Akasuna no Sasori had stopped being a criminal and now had a boyfriend.

And who was his precious boyfriend you may ask?

Detective Iwa

_The end_

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**The end kinda sucked,ne?**


End file.
